I am the creator of a special brand of anxiety. I notice small idiosyncrasies that make my heart twitch and inspire a fleeting moment of panic. This panic stems from my fear of having a sudden break with reality. The feeling can only be described as a glitch, or a stutter in my mind.
A wide range of subjects trigger my fight or flight mechanism, from debates over political issues to the overly contrasted colors of an object lying in the grass. Usually these feelings can be shrugged off or ignored. Sometimes they stick with me, forever arranging in my mind as a lifelong list of anxiety-producing moments. My anxiety is irrational and erratic. Yet that knowledge does not make my feelings any less real.